


In That Moment He Knew

by shutupandcupcake



Category: Supernatural
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2014-12-27
Updated: 2014-12-27
Packaged: 2018-03-03 19:47:04
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 349
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2884604
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/shutupandcupcake/pseuds/shutupandcupcake
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Dean struggles with his feelings for Castiel</p>
            </blockquote>





	In That Moment He Knew

**Author's Note:**

> This is just a prologue right now, and I'm trying to decide whether to post the rest. This is also my first fic, so tell me what you think!

    Even in his childhood, Dean knew something was different about him. When he was a little older he realized what that something may be, and as soon as he did it was shut down. It was something he would never let be. At first it consumed him, its enormity overwhelming him. He had to ignore it. Hide it. Get rid of it. It scared him more than anything. However, situations change.

    After his mother was killed by a yellow-eyed demon, that thing became of less importance. That’s not to say it became any less scary for Dean, but other things took precedence. Dean Winchester was raised to be a hunter. He lived a life where feelings were never a priority. So he kept it bottled up, and tried to forget.

    In his small pursuits of happiness he went through girl after girl, no one ever really meaning much. He did have one though, who stayed for a time. He truly loved her; she truly loved him. He never thought it could be possible that he would have such a happy life. He was confused by it, but it didn’t matter. All that mattered was that he loved her. Although, in the end, like the others his time with her ended. In this instance though, he left her to save her. This ending was one that devastated him.

    In his state of despair after losing her, emotions that had been driven away came back. He started to once again feel that thing which terrified and disgusted him creep back up. After once again feeling the panic that filled him at the thought of what he might be, he vowed against it. That’s something he could never be. Something he _wasn’t_.

    Time once again passes, and situations evolve further. He is rescued by an angel named Castiel. That sky-eyed man topples Dean’s hopes of crushing that something.

    It isn’t immediate. As Dean’s feelings never are. He instead has a tendency to squash, push, and shove them down until they burst into a dramatic epiphany. However this is what makes Dean, Dean.


End file.
